No, it’s not the title of a pot-heads in search of Tommy Chong road movie, or a National Geographic parody porn.  What I am referring to is the fact that 2009 will usher in a new era for Monkey Ltd in the form of our first feature film, titled The Grassman (which, as far as you know right now, is either one of the previously mentioned ideas).

2008 was a productive year for us.  Script competition successes, new short films completed, the expansion into the world of social networking, surviving the power-outage apocalypse and madness-enducing  promotional website images.  We did all right.

But, 2009 is going to be bigger, better, and more all right than ever before!

In addition to at least 2 new short films debuting on YouTube and the festival circuit, and more submissions of the Consumed script at competitions, there is that little thing I mentioned before called a feature film.  Yeah, that’s right. We got one of those.

We are into pre-production on The Grassman, and I am feverishly working on rewrites.  Well, not feverishly… but I am cursing a lot.

And you can look forward to following along  as we embark on that foolishness.  In the next two weeks, we will unveil our podcast, Jackasses Make Movie, which will provide unprecedented access into the inner workings of Monkey Ltd and, specifically, insight on how in hell we are trying to pull off our first feature.  I bet you just can’t wait!

So, a lot to look forward to.  This year, Monkey Ltd is going to hit you in the entertainment crotch with our steel-toed boot of juicy movie goodness.  And you will like it and beg us to do it again.

And we will.

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We have not posted anything for the past 2 weeks, and for good reason: I have finished writing the first draft of the script for our next project. More details will be forthcoming, but suffice it to say this is a low-budget action/horror feature in the woods, with action and horror and woods. That’s right, I said FEATURE. Members of the Monkey Ltd Inner Circle of Truth and Justice have all been given the script and the verdict is unanimous: it is as good as I just described. Even gooder.

Tyler and I have been going through the script, making notes, discussing changes, contemplating feasibility. It is going to be a tremendous undertaking, under very limiting conditions. But we, like most independent filmmakers, are used to it.  Not nearly at this level, but who cares. We are ready to pwn this shit, and we plan to invite all along for our journey as we document and share the entire experience, good or bad, via blogs, behind-the-scenes videos, and podcasts.

The end goal being, of course, distribution.

Which leads to my explaination of the title of this posting. See, if there is anything we have learned in this dog-gone crazy world of film, it’s that audiences (and distributors, and marketers) love them some titties. There are what I call the 4 T’s of getting distributed: Talent, Terror, Titties, and Tae-Bo (a name cast, gore, the aforementioned breastacles, and action). In my opinion, the main reason you see some of these films on video rental shelves (and on Sci-Fi) is that they have at least 3 of the 4 elements.

[NOTE: This extremely shallow and one-side bullshit I am spewing is in regards to low-budget distribution. It in no way meant to discount or disparage the thousands, if not dozens of quality films that get distributed every year for legitimate reasons. I mean, if I was right would we ever get to see  movies like The Hottie & the Nottie, 10,000 BC, and The Love Guru. I think not.]

We have the action and the gore covered.  However, this script is severely lacking in the titty and talent departments.  It’s four dudes and a thing, and we have no budget for talent.  So unless we make the thing a she (we could call the flick She Nekkid!) or shift our target demographic by showing the dudes’ dingly-danglies, we got nothing.

So,  even though the script does not call for it and we can in no way justify it, I am putting it out there: shows us your titties and get in our movie*.  Then, distribution is inevitable!

That, or we just cross our fingers that someone out there will appreciate a smart, high-concept, low-budget action/horror in the woods, with action and horror and woods and no titties. But a damn fine story.

*This offer is in no way official or supported by Monkey Ltd, it’s Circle of Truth and Justice, or its subsidiaries. It is jokes. Put your titties away before you hurt someone.